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The Merry Wives of Windsor - Act 2, scene 3
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Navigate this workThe Merry Wives of Windsor - Act 2, scene 3
Act 2, scene 3
Dr. Caius responds furiously when Sir Hugh fails to meet him for their duel. The Host calms his anger by offering to take him to Anne Page.Enter ⌜Doctor⌝ Caius ⌜and⌝ Rugby.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1156 Jack Rugby.
RUGBY 1157 Sir?
DOCTOR CAIUS 1158 Vat is the clock, Jack?
RUGBY 1159 ’Tis past the hour, sir, that Sir Hugh promised
1160 5 to meet.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1161 By gar, he has save his soul dat he is no
1162 come. He has pray his Pible well dat he is no come.
1163 By gar, Jack Rugby, he is dead already if he be
RUGBY 1165 10He is wise, sir. He knew your Worship would
1166 kill him if he came.
p. 81DOCTOR CAIUS 1167 By gar, de herring is no dead so as I vill
1168 kill him. Take your rapier, Jack. I vill tell you how I
1169 vill kill him.
RUGBY 1170 15Alas, sir, I cannot fence.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1171 Villainy, take your rapier.
RUGBY 1172 Forbear. Here’s company.
Enter Page, Shallow, Slender, ⌜and⌝ Host.
HOST 1173 ⌜God⌝ bless thee, bully doctor!
SHALLOW 1174 ⌜God⌝ save you, Master Doctor Caius!
PAGE 1175 20Now, good Master Doctor!
SLENDER 1176 Give you good morrow, sir.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1177 Vat be all you, one, two, tree, four, come
HOST 1179 To see thee fight, to see thee foin, to see thee traverse;
1180 25 to see thee here, to see thee there; to see
1181 ⌜thy⌝ pass, thy puncto, thy stock, thy reverse, thy
1182 distance, thy montant. Is he dead, my Ethiopian?
1183 Is he dead, my Francisco? Ha, bully? What says
1184 my Aesculapius, my Galien, my heart of elder, ha?
1185 30 Is he dead, bully stale? Is he dead?
DOCTOR CAIUS 1186 By gar, he is de coward jack-priest of de
1187 vorld. He is not show his face.
HOST 1188 Thou art a Castalion King Urinal Hector of
1189 Greece, my boy!
DOCTOR CAIUS 1190 35I pray you, bear witness that me have
1191 stay six or seven, two, tree hours for him, and he is
1192 no come.
SHALLOW 1193 He is the wiser man, Master Doctor. He is a
1194 curer of souls, and you a curer of bodies. If you
1195 40 should fight, you go against the hair of your professions.—
1196 Is it not true, Master Page?
PAGE 1197 Master Shallow, you have yourself been a great
1198 fighter, though now a man of peace.
SHALLOW 1199 Bodykins, Master Page, though I now be old
1200 45 and of the peace, if I see a sword out, my finger
p. 831201 itches to make one. Though we are justices and
1202 doctors and churchmen, Master Page, we have
1203 some salt of our youth in us. We are the sons of
1204 women, Master Page.
PAGE 1205 50’Tis true, Master Shallow.
SHALLOW 1206 It will be found so, Master Page.—Master
1207 Doctor Caius, I am come to fetch you home. I am
1208 sworn of the peace. You have showed yourself a
1209 wise physician, and Sir Hugh hath shown himself
1210 55 a wise and patient churchman. You must go with
1211 me, Master Doctor.
HOST 1212 Pardon, guest Justice. ⌜(To Caius.)⌝ A ⌜word,⌝
1213 Monsieur Mockwater.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1214 “Mockvater”? Vat is dat?
HOST 1215 60“Mockwater,” in our English tongue, is “valor,”
DOCTOR CAIUS 1217 By gar, then I have as much mockvater
1218 as de Englishman. Scurvy jack-dog priest! By gar,
1219 me vill cut his ears.
HOST 1220 65He will clapper-claw thee tightly, bully.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1221 “Clapper-de-claw”? Vat is dat?
HOST 1222 That is, he will make thee amends.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1223 By gar, me do look he shall clapper-de-claw
1224 me, for, by gar, me vill have it.
HOST 1225 70And I will provoke him to ’t, or let him wag.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1226 Me tank you for dat.
HOST 1227 And moreover, bully—⌜(He draws Shallow, Page,
and Slender aside.)⌝ 1228 But first, Master guest, and
1229 Master Page, and eke Cavaleiro Slender, go you
1230 75 through the town to Frogmore.
PAGE 1231 Sir Hugh is there, is he?
HOST 1232 He is there. See what humor he is in; and I will
1233 bring the doctor about by the fields. Will it do
SHALLOW 1235 80We will do it.
PAGE, SHALLOW, and SLENDER 1236 Adieu, good Master
1237 Doctor.⌜Page, Shallow, and Slender exit.⌝
p. 85DOCTOR CAIUS 1238 By gar, me vill kill de priest, for he speak
1239 for a jackanape to Anne Page.
HOST 1240 85Let him die. Sheathe thy impatience; throw cold
1241 water on thy choler. Go about the fields with me
1242 through Frogmore. I will bring thee where Mistress
1243 Anne Page is, at a farmhouse a-feasting, and
1244 thou shalt woo her. Cried game! Said I well?
DOCTOR CAIUS 1245 90By gar, me dank you vor dat. By gar, I
1246 love you, and I shall procure-a you de good guest:
1247 de earl, de knight, de lords, de gentlemen, my
HOST 1249 For the which I will be thy adversary toward
1250 95 Anne Page. Said I well?
DOCTOR CAIUS 1251 By gar, ’tis good. Vell said.
HOST 1252 Let us wag, then.
DOCTOR CAIUS 1253 Come at my heels, Jack Rugby.